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Your Body Belongs to You

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Manufacturer: Albert Whitman & Company
List Price: $6.99
Our Price: $3.34
You Save: $ 3.65 ( 52% )
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Average Ratings:

In simple, reassuring language, therapist Cornelia Spelman explains that a child's body is his or her own; that it is all right for children to decline a friendly hug or kiss, even from someone they love; and that "even if you don't want a hug or kiss right now, you can still be friends." A prefatory note helps parents talk to their children about good and bad touching. Full color.


DESCRIPTION:

Binding: Paperback
Dewey Decimal Number: 613.6
EAN: 9780807594735
ISBN: 0807594733
Label: Albert Whitman & Company
Manufacturer: Albert Whitman & Company
Number Of Items: 1
Number Of Pages: 24
Publication Date: 2000-03
Publisher: Albert Whitman & Company
Reading Level: Baby-Preschool
Studio: Albert Whitman & Company


SIMILAR ITEMS:

• Stranger Safety
• The Right Touch: A Read-Aloud Story to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse (Jody Bergsma Collection)
• The Berenstain Bears Learn About Strangers (First Time Books(R))
• My Body Is Private (Albert Whitman Prairie Books)
• Amazing You!: Getting Smart About Your Private Parts


CUSTOMER REVIEWS:

Customer Rating:
Summary: Touch Phobia
Comment: The author's main goal, as expressed by the title and in the introduction, is to teach that children should "...learn that being touched is their own choice, not another's; that `their bodies belong to them.'" That's an admirable goal, if somewhat radical. Traditionally parents and other adults have treated children's bodies as if they belong to us (mommy, daddy, etc.). Idealistically, children should be treated as autonomous individuals with their own rights, their own interests and their own desires.

But the text in this book doesn't wait long before contradicting the title and introductory note by promoting the idea that we don't want children to choose to be touched; we want them to choose to not be touched! "Some parts on your body should never be touched by other people..." That's not the way to empower children to make their own choices. It's a sneaky way to impose our preferences about what they should choose.

In the case of very young children, to whom this book is directed, autonomous choice may not be an appropriate goal because children need to be protected from serious injury. Although experience is often the best teacher, children tend to make a lot of mistakes, so we don't want to give them the opportunity to injure themselves.

The confusion begins when people assume that sexual contact (even sex play with peers) is usually seriously harmful, and hence there's an urgent need to protect children from any kind of sexual contact. (Curiously, the book doesn't mention self-masturbation. Does that imply it's acceptable or unthinkable? There should be some advice about appropriate hygiene.) But guess what? There is some evidence that sexual experience during childhood isn't usually seriously harmful.

The American Psychological Association published a study that found most adults who had sexual experience during childhood did not feel they were seriously injured by it. Another study published by doctors at Columbia University Children's Hospital (actually a meta-analysis of many studies) found that children were more harmed by the prudish attitudes and hysterical reactions of their parents than by the child's sexual experience itself.

Considering that evidence, responsible parents should think twice before terrorizing kids about "bad touch" or interrogating them after a casual report of sex play. Parents and other adults should be considered blameworthy if they worsen the effects of sexual experience or frighten children by exaggerating the dangers.

This short book isn't a substitute for comprehensive and balanced touch education. Amelia Auckett's book on baby and child massage recommends including the child's genital area in the massage. That's a view worth considering if you're tempted to steer a child's choices about wanting to be touched or not. If we take the main idea of this book seriously, that your body belongs to you, then we should cultivate the child's ability to make free and informed choices, not steer them to choose what we want them to choose.


Customer Rating:
Summary: Great intro book or classroom tool.
Comment: This book is a great resource for ages 3-6/7 to cover aspects of touching including unwanted touching, what to do if you don't want to be touched, areas of your body that are private and not keeping secrets. The great thing about this book is that overall it has a positive message - that most of the time kids like to be touched. This allows the book to be reader friendly to the children without scaring them. More importantly, it does not use specific body part language, instead referencing the area covered by your bathing suit as your "private parts". This makes it great for classroom use where the children are being introduced to their bodies and terminology at different times based on their curiosities and maturity (as determined best by the parents). I strongly disagree with any notion that a young child needs to know specific terminology in order to understand that certain areas of their body are private. With that said, children who are already familiar with this topic and have begun to have more specific questions about body parts and function or can grasp more complex scenarios may need a more advanced book on this topic (or you can just talk to them more specifically about it)! Overall, great first book to introduce your child about child abuse safety and suitable unoffensive book for classroom use.

Customer Rating:
Summary: good for preschooler
Comment: Since our 3.5 year old son attends a preschool with lots of different adults taking care of him I wanted to find a way to start talking to him about appropriate touching. I had no idea how to do this with a 3.5 year old so I looked through book reviews and decided on this book. It's a very mild approach to telling children about their bodies. It starts off focusing on hugging and how it's mostly a nice thing but you can tell someone if you don't want to be hugged etc.. It also discusses private areas covered by your bathing suit and telling mom if anyone were to ever touch those private areas. It's a good tool to use in teaching very young children about a very tricky subject.

Customer Rating:
Summary: SMART book
Comment: This is a book that children can related to and adults can agree with. These things need to be talked about and taught to children.

Customer Rating:
Summary: Great for very young children
Comment: This book is the best one I found on this topic for very young and innocent children. My daughter scares very easily so I needed something that would not scare her but help her understand she needs to keep her privates covered. This helped but we still have occasions when she forgets to keep the dresses DOWN! LOL

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